


The Afterlife

by AmeBot2038



Series: all JATP works [2]
Category: Julie and The Phantoms (TV)
Genre: Alex' parents are garbage, Boyfriends, Flashbacks, Fluff, He wants to make up, Here's your manual for basic skateboarding, Home Is Where My Horse Is, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Including cosplay pictures, Julie is a good friend, Luke and Alex fight, Luke feels bad, Luke is frustrated, M/M, My headcanons, Reggie Has A Panic Attack, Reggie loves books, Reggie's parents are garbage, Skateboarding, The Last Bookstore, Venice, Willie is a good teacher, Writer's Block
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-12
Updated: 2020-11-15
Packaged: 2021-03-10 03:00:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,012
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27527272
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AmeBot2038/pseuds/AmeBot2038
Summary: One HC for each of the boys based on my cosplays.1) Alex is learning to skateboard2) Reggie is good with literature3) Luke sings finally Home Is Where My Horse IsThe chapters are slightly connected with each other.
Relationships: Alex & Julie Molina & Luke Patterson & Reggie, Alex & Luke Patterson & Reggie (Julie and The Phantoms), Alex/Luke Patterson (Julie and The Phantoms), Alex/Willie (Julie and The Phantoms), Julie Molina & Reggie, Luke Patterson/Reggie (Julie and The Phantoms), Ray Molina & Reggie
Series: all JATP works [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2027713
Comments: 26
Kudos: 162





	1. Alex

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex tries to skate and fails. Willie helps him. They're in LA so there's no better place to learn how to skate than Venice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you ever wanted to feel the vibe of Venice through a song, I found the perfect one. Please enjoy if you want. I had it on repeat while writing this chapter.  
> It's Venice by Gyvus  
> https://open.spotify.com/track/5VmL8CrjM82tIGWwum8Cbo?si=P7tCBMmvTpy5kbLDbc9o4Q

Julie and Carlos were at school, and Ray was on his way to a client when Alex snuck into the Molina’s house. He had no intention of actually committing a crime, yet he felt as if he was doing something forbidden. If he were alive, his heart would have beaten so fast and so loud that everyone would have heard it. Adrenaline would have rushed through his body, but now there was only silence in him, which didn’t make him calm and feel better, though.

Hurriedly and in a stooped posture, Alex scurried up the stairs to the upper floor and into Carlos' room. No sooner had he entered the room than he saw what he was looking for. It was leaning next to the desk. Carlos' skateboard. Alex had seen the boy riding it a few days ago, and at this sight he had the idea that he could learn it. This way he would have another thing in common with Willie, and he wouldn't have to run after him all the time. Actually, he only wanted to learn it to impress Willie. Since the show at the Orpheum, they had spent almost every free minute together when they both had time. For Alex, that was not enough, because Willie always had to watch out that Caleb didn't notice anything, although he had been quiet for quite a while. So, they still only saw each other every few days. Alex was all the happier that they’d met later. Willie always couldn't say exactly when he could leave the HGC, but Alex would just wait for Willie, practice a bit and then show him his driving skills.

A little scared Alex looked around and listened, but nothing could be heard. Reggie and Luke played in the studio on their guitars and tried out new melodies. When it came to the instruments of the two, Alex always disengaged. He had no idea about it, and he couldn't keep up with Reggie and Luke's enthusiasm, anyway. Besides, the two of them were probably glad that they had a little time for themselves. Not that Alex expected that they would finally stop being completely oblivious to each other's staring, but he hadn't given up hope yet. At some point, they just had to realize it. Even before their death, the two had been constantly looking at each other with longing. Especially, when they shared a mic on stage. In the beginning Alex had found it funny to watch them, but it only annoyed him by now. He couldn't stand the fact that they were both simply completely oblivious. However, he was sure that once they had dived into their world of music, they would definitely not look for him, which was good in this case.

Before the courage could leave him, he grabbed the skateboard and fled the house. Out of sheer excitement, he almost walked through the closed door until it occurred to him that the skateboard would crash against it. So, he left the room the mundane way. With quick steps he went to the garage, from the inside of which guitar sounds could still be heard.

_They won't get out of there so quickly_ , Alex thought, calming down.

He put the board on the floor and looked at it. It looked just like Willie's, and he had seen Willie skate often enough. So, it couldn’t be that hard, right? Willie’s skating always looked easy.

Taking a deep breath to get his fear under control, Alex put one foot on the board and moved the other forward to push off. His foot didn’t even touch the ground. He immediately noticed how he lost his balance. His body leaned too far forward. Alex stumbled in shock. Pushed by his clumsy steps, the board rolled backwards and away from him.

_Thank God, I could still catch myself_ , thought Alex, who put his hands on his knees to recover from his fright.

Despite a botched start, he didn’t want to give up yet. He got back on the board and tried to push off again. This time his foot had touched the ground, and he pushed off, but this time he couldn't hold on either. With eyes wide open and arms flailing wildly, he tried to keep his balance, but in vain. The board got a push, slipped away under his foot and raced towards the garage door, while Alex tipped backwards and hit the floor the next moment.

He didn't have time to get back up or calm down, before the door was opened and Reggie and Luke looked down at him. They spotted the skateboard and knew immediately what had happened. Laughing, they approached him to help him up.

"Look, who wanted to impress his crush" Luke teased. "Guess it didn't work out too well."

"Shut up."

Alex was just getting back on his feet when Willie appeared in front of him. He too understood the situation immediately and started to grin broadly.

"Not a word," Alex growled. "Let's just get out of here."

Laughing, Willie grabbed Alex's hand, and they both poofed out.

Alex found himself in Venice. It was noon, and the beach was empty. In some distance Alex could see the Santa Monica Pier.

"I am surprised that it’s so empty," Alex said.

"Yeah, we are in the heart of Venice, the tourists always just gather on the Walk of Fame, at the Hollywood Sign or something. Only the people who appreciate Venice for its lifestyle come here. The skaters, the surfers, the hipsters. I'm often here and enjoy the sea."

Alex nodded understandingly. He could still remember a gig on the Santa Monica Pier. In the summer there were always concerts there, and one evening it was Sunset Curve. It was a very special experience to live out their passion and watch the sunset over the Pacific Ocean.

"So, you want to learn to skate?" Willie asked.

"Don't bother. I'm a hopeless case," Alex contradicted sheepishly and embarrassed.

"Nonsense. You probably just made typical beginner's mistakes. Let me explain."

"Whatever."

Actually, Alex didn't care what he did as long as he could spend time with Willie. He just didn't want to embarrass himself in front of him. At least not completely.

Willie's skateboard appeared in front of him.

"Your first mistake was practicing on the ground in front of the garage. Way too uneven. Here the path is flat and smooth. Ideal conditions. No hills, no paving stones. “

Alex nodded understandingly. That made sense.

"Next, you need to know how to place your feet on the board. Here the road is straight, but it's not always that way."

All of a sudden, Alex felt stupid. He hadn't thought at all that you can maybe steer with a skateboard.

Willie stood on his board, his feet parallel to the axles to which the wheels were attached. Skilled, he moved the feet so that Alex could see the board leaning to either side.

"You steer by putting more weight on the side you want to drive to. Therefore, it is important that the rear foot is as close as possible to the rear axle. That way you have a better feeling for steering. But not on the tail or you will lose your balance and the skateboard will tip backwards."

Alex nodded, even though he had no idea what the tail was. He just assumed that it was the slightly curved end of the board. Nothing else would make sense. However, he didn't want to ask questions either so as not to appear completely dumb.

"Okay, you can put the front foot straight on the board for starters. You don't have to take such sharp turns at the beginning that you need both feet to steer. It’s also more difficult to turn your foot after pushing. When you push, you always keep your foot straight forward so that you don't accidentally steer in the wrong direction. It is also quite uncomfortable. When you have a bit more practice, you turn your foot 90° after the push so that you can steer better."

Willie looked at Alex waiting.

"What is the push?", Alex asked hesitantly and noticed again how he blushed.

"Oh yeah, sorry. The push is the pushing off the ground that you do to get ahead."

Alex nodded understandingly.

"Okay, your turn now."

Willie jumped off his skateboard and placed Alex behind him.

"Don't panic, you're not supposed to drive yet. Let's first find out which leg you push with. You know instinctively which side feels right. Just like you know which side of your bike you are walking on when you push it, or which side you put your backpack on first."

Again, Alex nodded and stood to the right of the board before turning to Willie.

"I want you to stand on the board - I'll hold your hand if you want - and get a feel for it first. The deck is always in motion, and you need to be familiar with it to keep your balance. Put your left foot on the board so that the tip of your foot is between the wheels."

Alex nodded once more and reached out his hand. Willie grabbed it, smiling before Alex did what Willie had said. Only now did he realize that he had hardly said a word because he was so concentrated. He was determined to remember everything Willie had explained and not make a complete fool of himself when he tried to skate.

"Now place the second foot back across the axle."

Alex looked backwards to find the right place.

"Move your back foot a little to feel the range of the inclination and don’t be afraid. I'll hold on to you."

Once Alex followed the instruction, he began to sway, and his feet trembled to restore balance. But after leaning back and forth a few times with Willie's help, he got used to the feeling and gained more and more confidence.

"I'm gonna let you go now, and you do the same thing again, okay?"

"What?! No! Don't let go of me!" Alex exclaimed, startled and with eyes wide open.

"Don't worry, Hot Dog. I'm right here and will catch you if you fall," Willie replied laughing.

Before Alex could go on being embarrassed or anxious, Willie had already let go of his hand and Alex was busy keeping his balance, but he managed.

"Very good and now you drive. Very slowly at first, push off a little bit with your foot and just roll straight out."

After a deep breath, Alex did just that.

"No, not with the front foot!" Willie called.

Scared, Alex immediately jumped off the skateboard. Of course, he stumbled promptly and landed clumsily in Willie's arms, who immediately started laughing again.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you. I just didn't want you to fall. You always push with your back foot. That's why you always leave the front foot perpendicular to the axis when you push. Remember? So, you don't steer."

"Oh. Yeah, sorry," Alex murmured sheepishly.

"No problem. Just try it again."

Alex nodded and broke away from Willie with a heavy heart.

He tried it again and found that it wasn't that hard once you knew how the skateboard moved under your feet. With every push he became safer and faster. It was really fun. Grinning broadly, Alex did snake lines and turned the board around when he wanted to go back to Willie. Willie looked satisfied and watched him smiling. Alex rolled slowly towards him, and Willie stopped him completely by grabbing his hips.

"Hopeless case my ass," Willie said with a grin and looked up at Alex.

"You are simply a good teacher," Alex replied with a smile.

"Or you a natural."

Before Alex thought too much again, he just bent down and kissed Willie. After a second of surprise, Willie returned the kiss and Alex sighed contentedly and relieved, which made Willie laugh. Both grinning, they pressed their foreheads together.

"I can't believe this really happened," Alex mumbled.

Confused, Willie looked at him.

"Did I misinterpret any signs? Didn't you mean to kiss me?", Willie asked startled and was already about to break away from Alex.

The drummer stumbled off the skateboard and wrapped his arms around Willie.

"No, no," he reassured him. "That's not what I meant. I just grew up in a time when kissing you here surrounded by so many people would’ve been impossible. Before I died, it was only a matter of time before my parents would have kicked me out. So, I'm enjoying this, us, right now very much."

"Well, no one's exactly seeing us, but I know what you mean. It was the same with me."

Alex was strangely happy to have found someone who understood his problem.

"You should have seen my parents. I came out to Reggie first. He took it easy, like he always does. We talked about my crush from school, and I said that I wanted to know what it would be like to kiss that guys or even to kiss anyone that is. Reggie just replied, 'You can kiss me. I don't mind.' So, I kissed him...

“My parents came home at that moment. I've never seen them that angry. They looked at me like I was the most disgusting thing they had ever seen. Their child being gay was the worst thing that could happen. Nevertheless, I still got off lightly compared to Reggie. His parents were the worst. They ruined his whole childhood and youth."

Alex got sad when he remembered that he was the reason Reggie was so miserable after that kiss.

"Hey, the fact that Reggie's parents suck is not your fault. Now, you're rid of them, and you can start over with Julie, right? You can't change the past, but all doors are open for you guys now."

Willie smiled encouragingly.

"Thank you, Willie," Alex whispered and gave Willie a kiss on the cheek.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Unfortunately, I couldn't take my board with me when I was in LA. Maybe some day. I hope you enjoyed this first headcanon. Kudos, comments and critic is very much welcome!


	2. Reggie

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reggie can't stand fights and has a breakdown. Julie is a good friend and helps him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I literally can't get enough of the cast talking about the relationships of their characters.  
> Since Charlie and Owen both agreed that Luke and Alex had a thing: Have it  
> Since Charlie ships Ruke and is really close to Jeremy: Have it

The mood in the band was tense for a few days already. Luke had writer’s block and as always, when he didn’t know how to get on with a song, he was obnoxious. Luke was an excellent writer, and he knew that too. All the more frustrated he became as soon as he was no longer satisfied with his lyrics. Reggie and Alex already knew this side of him. As soon as they noticed the onset of the writer’s block, they left him alone. They had warned Julie, but the singer didn’t want to let Luke down and was convinced that she could help him. Nothing was good enough for Luke, though. He didn’t accept help from others, and the blockade was only over when he himself was satisfied with his lyrics again. After two days, Julie had also given up annoyed. So that they didn’t get out of practice, band rehearsals still took place. Besides, they all enjoyed the time when there were four of them and could do what they loved most. Especially, Reggie needed the rehearsals and insisted on them. It was hard enough for him so see Luke acting like that. If they’d stop practicing together, his anxiety would go through the roof. He was always scared the band would break up if they were all a little stressed. They were so close to each other by now that it was strange if they did not see each other every day, anyway, so nobody really was against band practice.

Julie, Alex and Reggie diligently overlooked the fact that Luke’s play was really bad and that he always missed his cue by a second. They didn’t want to lose the relaxed, euphoric mood that always spread between them when they played their songs.

On one of the newer songs Alex was not very sure about his part, and the mistakes he made made it difficult for the others to continue playing and singing because the drums were so loud. Angrily, Luke put his guitar in its stand and drove around to Alex.

"Maybe you should practice a little more and not always skate and make out with Willie all the time," Luke snorted.

Alex, who was otherwise always a bit scared and reserved, turned red with rage. He jumped up from his stool and came around his drum kit to build himself up in front of Luke.

"That’s enough! You’ve been spreading nothing but bad mood for a week now, nobody can stand it around you, you’re messing up every single note and every cue. You don’t accept help from anyone, and you blame me? After we all had to endure your terrible performance?"

Normally, Alex could handle Luke’s bad mood, but he wouldn’t leave a bad word about his boyfriend uncommented. That was too much. It made Reggie happy to see Alex being so proud and comfortable with himself, even if he was scared about their argument.

Julie stared at them stunned. She would never have thought that Luke would treat one of his best friends that way. When she thought about it, though, it actually fitted into the picture. For Luke, music was the top priority and everything else was just a distraction. She had experienced that herself. Luke was interested in her when it came to music, but he didn’t return her feelings. She had quickly figured that out. In the beginning, she was devastated, then she hated him, but in the end the joy of making music together outweighed.

Reggie, on the other hand, knew such disputes from the past. Luke and Bobby had been having regular fights. Just like back then, he felt very uncomfortable. Everything in him urged him to flee and hide, so that he wouldn’t have to hear the screaming anymore. But he couldn’t do that. Luke and Alex would not magically leave it alone, and Julie didn’t know how to deal with them. They had never argued in front of her before. Besides, Reggie didn’t want to leave Julie alone either. She didn’t deserve that. He summoned up all his courage and locked his bass in its stand before turning around to face the argument.

"Oh, maybe you should write our songs lately if I’m so bad at it. Why don’t you become a guitarist either?" Luke shouted.

"Guys," Reggie stepped in. "Now calm down. This doesn’t lead to any solution."

He placed himself between the two, arms raised.

"Luke started it. He always has no control over himself as soon as things don’t go his way! Just because he realizes he sucks doesn’t mean he has to take it out on us and not on Willie at all," Alex continued.

"Alex, come on. We are a family. We help each other when one of us has a problem," Reggie explained and could see Alex calming down a bit while taking a deep breath.

"Oh, I’m the only problem?" Luke shouted in indignation. "So, you’re taking his side, Reggie?"

All of a sudden Reggie was back in his childhood, back with his parents. Every day, nothing but fights. His parents were screaming at each other, they were yelling at him. Every day Reggie was afraid they were going to get a divorce. The fear of having to choose who he wanted to live with. Reggie was afraid of his parents and preferred not to live with either of them, but he was also afraid of what would happen if they actually got a divorce. He knew what to expect when he came home from school and that he would somehow cope. But what would happen if his parents got divorced? Could it really make things better? He had suppressed all hope long ago because he was afraid of being disappointed when things wouldn’t get better. His parents didn’t make his situation any better either by manipulating and harassing him again and again. ‘Who do you like better, baby? Mommy or Daddy?’ ‘Daddy is not here to forbid it. Let’s watch TV.’ ‘Do you feel like a pizza? Mommy’s not here to scold us if we eat anything unhealthy.’ Reggie always tried to please everybody and was always torn between the two.

Reggie had a hard time shake off these memories. Luke behaved exactly like his parents. But there were more important things. This fight had to be resolved.

"I am not on either side. I just want us all to get along again."

"None of this would have happened if you hadn’t insisted on this band rehearsal," Luke enthused. "I told you from the start, I don’t feel like it. But no, Reggie wants to, so everyone has to do what he says. This fight is only your fault!"

It had been a relatively quiet day, his parents had cooked in silence. They didn’t talk to each other like other couples, but at least they didn’t yell at each other, but cooked together. Reggie had got a D on his French test because he couldn’t concentrate on learning with all the shouting and wasn’t getting enough sleep. Anxiously, he pushed the work over the table. Immediately, a fight began over the fact that the other one should take more care of Reggie, and then they returned to the everyday topics: Dad worked too much. Mom had too many hobbies. Dad drank too much. Mom spent too much money. When both of them needed to catch their breath for a moment, his father sparkled at Reggie and growled: ‘This is all your fault.

Reggie saw a hand coming towards him and ducked in panic.

"No, please don’t," he whispered.

Luke felt as if someone had poured ice-cold water over his head. All anger was gone, and in horror he lowered the hand which he had reached out to pull Reggie into a hug. No sooner had the words left his mouth than he realized what he had said and to whom he had said it. Luke had understood immediately what he had done to Reggie. Alex wanted to say something, but Luke had stopped him to apologize to Reggie. He wanted to hug his best friend, but the expression of sheer panic on Reggie’s face made him stumble back. Reggie had crouched down and raised his arms to protect his head.

Stunned, Luke stared at him before he exchanged a look with Alex, who also looked shocked.

"It’s been ages since he had his last panic attack," Alex whispered.

"We’ve been dead for 25 years," Luke deadpanned.

"It’s never been this bad. How could we have triggered him so much?" Alex asked guiltily.

Luke squeezed his shoulder compassionately before slowly approaching Reggie. With a feet distance, he sat down on the floor.

"Hey, Reg. It’s Luke," he began quietly and as gently as possible. "You’re safe. You’re in the studio, in Julie’s garage. No one is going to hurt you. I’m here, Alex is here, Julie is here, too. We are all here and we love you. We just want you to be safe. Everything’s gonna be okay. Can I give you a hug?"

Luke’s loving voice got through to Reggie, and he could finally shake off the gruesome memories of his childhood. He longed so much for attention and love. He longed for Luke. Reggie wanted nothing more than to be taken in Luke’s arms. He wanted to bury his face on Luke’s neck and never let go, but he couldn’t. Luke felt nothing for him, and Reggie couldn’t show his feelings so obviously. He would ruin everything. It would destroy the band, and he couldn’t let that happen. The band was all he had.

So instead of giving in to his innermost desire, Reggie stumbled a few steps away from Luke.

"I- I can’t," he stammered and disappeared.

Horrified, Luke looked at the spot where Reggie had just been standing. Alex knelt down next to him and put one hand on Luke’s shoulder.

"What have I done? Alex, what have I done?!"

"Give him some time."

"He was so afraid of me," Luke whispered and tears gleamed in his eyes.

"I don’t think he was afraid of you. Only of the memory."

"How could I let it come to this? I know what an argument does to him."

"I’m gonna go find Reggie," Julie mumbled.

Alex and Luke turned to her in surprise. Both had completely forgotten that Julie was still here.

"Please be careful," Alex said. "Always ask his permission, and be quiet and slow, otherwise it will only upset him more."

Julie nodded anxiously.

"We’ll wait here if you need us. I think it’s better if he doesn’t see us for a while. We’ve done enough."

At Alex’s words, Luke buried his face in his hands.

* * *

Reggie ran searchingly through the Molinas’ house. Restlessly, his fingers played with the flannel around his hips while Reggie desperately searched for Ray. Ray was always Reggie’s haven of peace and quiet, and he was exactly the kind of father Reggie had always wanted. Right now, Ray was all that kept Reggie from completely breaking down, but he didn’t find him. Helplessly, the bass player let himself sink to the floor in the kitchen. He sat down leaning against the counter, his knees drawn to his chest. He had wrapped his arms around his legs and buried his head in them. Hard sobs came out of his mouth, which Reggie desperately tried to suppress. It was just all too much. First the fight between Alex and Luke, the two most important people in Reggie’s life. All the memories of his childhood. The almost unquenchable desire to be close to Luke and just throw yourself into his arms. It was too much. Reggie couldn’t handle it, couldn’t process it all at once, and Ray wasn’t here to ground him, no one was there to reassure Reggie. Reggie was alone.

"Reggie?"

Julie’s soft voice shook Reggie from his spiraling, but he couldn’t look at her. He just couldn’t.

"May I sit next to you?" she asked.

Reggie just nodded barely noticeably, whereupon Julie slowly came closer and sat down.

"May I touch you?"

Another nod before Julie reached out and gently stroked through Reggie’s hair. A little later he leaned into her tender touches and after a few minutes he let himself sink completely against Julie so that she could hug him.

"Name one thing you’re interested in. Apart from music," Julie said. "Is there anything you would like to do?"

"I’ve always loved to read," Reggie muttered.

"Really? My mom and I used to love to stroll around our favorite bookstore, but I haven’t been there in ages. Will you go with me?"

Reggie broke away from her a little to be able to look at her. Julie gave him a beaming smile, and Reggie couldn’t help but reciprocate and nod.

"Really? Great, I’ll just get my backpack and then we can go. “

She disappeared and was back a little later, a backpack on her shoulders and headphones in her ears.

"So, we can talk," she explained, pointing to the headphones.

Together, they set out on their journey.

* * *

They got on the subway and headed Downtown Los Angeles. The compartment was surprisingly empty.

"It’s so nice that we go to the bookstore together. My mom and I used to do this together a lot in the past. We had so many mutual interests. We did almost everything together. From the store I got my first sheet music for piano, my first LPs and cassettes. I associate so many memories with this store. It will be nice to revive that. It’s good that you’re coming with me. I would never have dared to go alone."

Julie just kept talking to herself. She was in a good mood and didn’t care that Reggie was silent.

"I have no fond memories of my parents," Reggie finally murmured.

Julie immediately fell silent and looked at him encouragingly.

"My parents have been fighting ever since I can remember. There was always just shouting, dishes being thrown around. My parents screamed at each other, they screamed at me. I know nothing else."

"I’m sorry about that."

Reggie just nodded.

"In the beginning everything wasn’t that hard. They argued occasionally. That is normal, but at some point, the first plate flew. Then they argued every day. First only with each other, then they yelled at me when I did something wrong. At some point I was always the guilty one. It was probably easier for them to blame me. Then at some point they started fighting about me. Who I should live with if they broke up.

"In the early ‘90s, my dad started drinking and well. It did not get better. For every mistake, every bad grade, for every wrong look he, well. Worst of all, it was a year before we died. I was at Alex’, and he came out to me. He was crushing about Luke. We kissed because he wanted to know what it was like. Kissing a girl wasn’t a option for him. His parents came home and caught us.

"My parents were informed and thought I was gay too. My father tried to exorcise this ‘disease’ so that I wouldn’t be a complete disgrace to the family."

Reggie looked at Julie carefully. She looked shocked and tears gleamed in her eyes.

"I hope you know that you are a wonderful person. None of what your parents accused you of is the truth. It is not your fault that they were unhappy with each other, and they should have taken better care of you. But that’s over. You have Luke and Alex and me. You have my dad, who can’t see you, but still loves you because you helped me. You have Carlos. I know you guys found a way to talk. Don’t even try to deny it."

Julie looked at him reproachfully, and a smile approached Reggie’s lips.

"I wish my dad had been like Ray. Alex and Luke both had a hard time at home when the band became more and more successful, but they always listened to my problems anyway. Since the beginning of our friendship without complaining once. I don’t know what I’d do without them or what I’ve done to deserve this."

"You deserve this because you are a good person, because you are just as helpful, you’re compassionate and caring, because you are a great musician, and because you always make others laugh," Julie replied with a smile.

"I only ever tell so many jokes because I’m afraid to argue. We have known each other so long that I can read Alex and Luke like an open book, pun intended. I know immediately when they are in a bad mood and what I have to do to prevent a fight. It was hard sometimes with Bobby in the past. Most of the time Luke pulled himself together or only argued with him when I wasn’t there, but I noticed anyway. Luke was also always the first to know when things were particularly bad at home. He was always there to give me a hug and to calm me down. He must hate me after I just disappeared like that earlier."

Reggie repentantly let his head hang down, while countless negative thoughts were already gathering in his head. Julie put her hand on his after looking around to see if anyone was watching her.

"Luke could never hate you. He will understand and won’t blame you. Trust me. I haven’t known him as long as you have, but I’m sure he just wishes he could make up with you again."

Talking to Julie was different from talking to Alex or Luke, but still Reggie felt safe and secure in her presence. He trusted her.

The metro stopped at their destination, and they got off to walk the rest of the way.

"By the way, you mentioned earlier that Alex had a crush on Luke. Were they, like, together?” Julie asked curious.

“Oh yeah, they dated for a few months in 1994. It wasn’t too serious, though. Just figuring things out together. We were all very close, even back then, it didn’t make much of a difference. However, they decided they work better as friends. I think it wasn’t more than a crush, not being seriously in love with each other, you know?”

“Yeah, I get it. Glad you’re still friends, though. I guess it was kinda awkward after they broke up?”

“Yeah, kinda, but we got it handled. We were always really affectionate with each other, always touchy, always close, but sometimes you can still see them acting like a couple. Holding hands and that stuff,” Reggie explained smiling.

“And what is that thing between you and Luke? Is Alex okay with that", Julie asked teasingly and grinned at him.

Reggie felt caught and turned red. He had hoped that death would have spared him this, but apparently Reggie still had to suffer even when dead.

"I have no idea what you mean."

Before Reggie could continue talking, Julie lifted a finger and stopped it.

"Oh, yes. Don’t even try to talk your way out of it. We’ve had enough serious talk for the day. I want to gossip. So, just get it out already. What’s going on, and especially how long has it been going on?"

"There’s nothing, Julie. It’s all in your head."

"So, what you say is, I imagine that you keep touching each other ‘accidentally’ because that’s ‘what buddies do’," she asked sarcastically. "Or how you always stare at each other when we play a song or you share a microphone every time? Or how you both always start to beam when the other one enters the room?

Reggie sighed. Julie had seen through him. He never doubted that Alex had known about Reggie’s feelings for years, even though Alex had never said a word. But the fact that even Julie had understood everything in no time made Reggie nervous. What if Luke knew, too? Reggie didn’t plan to actually act on his feelings, he wouldn’t do that to Alex or Julie. He was used to see Luke with other people by now, so he’d be fine.

"Luke’s always been like that. He treats everyone that way. He has no feelings for me, and I would never come between you. So, you have nothing to worry about. I’m happy for you guys."

"Oh, no, Luke doesn’t treat everyone like that. Believe me, there was a time I wished he would look at me the way he looks at you, but Luke and I are just good at making music together because we understand each other. But that’s nothing compared to the connection you two have. Trust me. It’s much easier for everyone if I stay away from Luke anyway."

Confused, Reggie stopped and stared at Julie.

"But you ooze chemistry."

Julie made a face at that sentence, probably out of the same reason as Alex did.

"Yeah, maybe, but only when it comes to music. I thought he also wanted more, but he was only interested in my music. That’s okay," Julie replied, shrugging. "I would be happy if you two would be happy together."

Reggie replied nothing as he walked on. He couldn’t put into words how relieved he was that Julie accepted his feelings just like that. But most of all, he was glad that she didn’t ask why he was into a boy. She just accepted it as if it wasn’t worth mentioning, and apparently it wasn’t any more in 2020. A broad smile crept on Reggie’s lips as they entered the bookstore together, which they had finally reached. ‘The Last Bookstore’ was on the outside of the facade. The store was huge. To the right next to the entrance were countless LPs, which Reggie immediately took a close look at. In the past he and his grandpa had always listened to LPs of old rock and country bands. That’s how he had come to his two favorite genres in music. Julie looked around herself, probably looking for old bands she had discovered with her mom. The light shone through the huge shop windows, and Reggie looked at the decorations. Countless plants stood on the windowsills along with tape recorders and other stuff.

Reggie looked around in amazement, it was the largest bookstore he had ever seen. He spotted Julie at the right end of the store and went to her. She was browsing through a cookbook.

"Looking for something, Reg? If not, we can walk around the whole store and look at everything if you want to," Julie said without looking up.

Reggie nodded enthusiastically, unable to say anything. Julie looked up and smiled at him.

"Okay, so here are cookbooks, back there are non-fiction books," explained Julie as they strolled through the aisles together.

"I miss high school. Sure, it was annoying, but somehow I miss learning new things," Reggie murmured as he passed various math books. "I feel like I know too little. Like someone who dropped out of school. Not that it matters. I don’t need to learn a trade or earn money."

With a shrug of the shoulders, he walked on, but Julie stopped and looked at the books. She couldn’t imagine if her life would be over from one moment to the next, and she would only come back after everything had changed. She shook off the thought and followed Reggie.

Together they walked through every aisle and looked at all the books. The store was really something special. There were many special decorations like a book tunnel and flying books. There were books on every topic. There were small galleries where people sold their stuff. It was a magical place and Reggie understood why Julie and her mom liked coming here.

"Oh my God, Julie, look! There is a Star Wars book. Star Wars as a play, like William Shakespeare," Reggie exclaimed excitedly.

"Oh wow. This is cool! The cover is really nice."

Reggie scrolled through the first pages.

"Oh look. They even have a dramatis personae with all characters. There is Luke Skywalker with them. Wait, the guy on the cover. Is that Luke just older? Oh gosh, what is that cute thing? Julie, look!"

"This is a Porg. I don’t know about Star Wars, but these birds were so cute, they were all over the internet."

"Julie, will you buy me that book? Pretty please?" Reggie begged and looked at her with huge puppy eyes.

"You didn’t even dare to watch the other movies because you were afraid you wouldn’t like them and now you want to read the eighth part as a book?" Julie asked laughing.

Embarrassed, Reggie scratched the back of his head, but couldn’t suppress his grin. Julie took the book out of his hand and put it in her basket with the cookbook she had her hands on before. Reggie hugged her stormy, which made her laugh.

* * *

While Reggie continued to talk about Star Wars and told Julie all about the first three movies he had seen, she paid for the books and they headed home together. Reggie wanted to start reading right away, but he didn’t want to know what had happened before. A smile had spread on Julie’s lips and wouldn’t go away while she followed Reggie’s enthusiasm. The whole way home he talked incessantly about Star Wars. Only when they entered the Molinas’ house Reggie did seem to notice that he had been talking the whole time.

"Sorry," he murmured embarrassed.

"No problem," replied Julie and handed him his book before she gave him a kiss on the cheek.

Reggie made his way to the garage. Satisfied, he opened the door. No sooner had he entered the studio than Alex and Luke were right next him.

"Reggie! We were so worried," Alex said relieved.

Luke hugged Reggie wordlessly and pressed him to him.

"I’m so sorry," he whispered.

"It’s all right. I’m fine. I had a great time with Julie," Reggie replied reassuringly and pulled Alex into the hug as well.

They stood there for a long time, enjoying the closeness to the others, and Reggie felt comfortable, safe. He was home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Second big recommendation if you ever visit LA: Check out The Last Bookstore. It's the most beautiful and magical bookstore I've ever seen in my life. They have literally everything. Fun fact: I bought that Star Wars book there, and it's so cool. There is a really cool cover with Luke Skywalker which I left at home because I was scared it could get damaged. Check the book out. It's literally the coolest thing.


	3. Luke

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Luke feels bad because he triggered Reggie's panic attack, so he decides to do him a favor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Reggie was definitely my favorite chapter to write, but I love my cosplay picture of Luke the most.
> 
> Lyrics by Jeremy Shada, check his YouTube video out if you haven't already

No one else was there when Luke entered the studio. Alex was out with Willie, probably skating somewhere and Reggie was at school with Julie. Ever since Reggie found that Star Wars book, he had been obsessed with learning more. Julie hadn't been exactly thrilled about him joining her at first because she expected him to be just fooling around and distracting her, but after the first day her doubts were shattered. Reggie had always been good at school. He always had better grades than Luke, not as good as Alex, though. However, Reggie was the only one who was really happy to go to school. Luke was there a lot, too, but only in the hope of persuading Julie to skip classes so they could continue rehearsing. Since he now had to convince Reggie as well, he had given it up. Actually, Julie benefited from Reggie's presence in class, since he always helped her with her homework and studying. Whenever they were not rehearsing or Julie was spending time with Flynn, Reggie would tutor her. Luke admired their ambition.

Nevertheless, he was bored now and didn't know what to do with himself. He looked around the studio and noticed how chaotic it was. If none of the guys were here, he might as well work on the new songs. He had to find his journal first, though. So, he went on a search and cleaned up a little bit. By now he was really good at moving things around. Since Julie had broken Caleb's spell, the guys didn't have many problems anymore.

Luke cleared away packages of take-out food that Julie and Flynn had left behind, the boys' clothes, Alex's drumsticks that always seemed to be lying around everywhere, single sheets of paper with scribbled lines, tons of cables, microphones and much more. He finally found his journal under the couch, which made sense. Luke had been working on a song with Julie yesterday and they had made themselves comfortable on the couch. It must have fallen off at some point. He also found another ripped out page under the couch.

_Home Is Where My Horse Is_

Luke groaned, but couldn’t stop himself from laughing. He probably never got rid of this song, probably he attracted Reggie's country songs like a magnet. He pulled out the sheet of paper and was about to sit down on the couch to read the lyrics when he noticed an ukulele next to the couch. It was almost completely covered by a plant and was also very small, which is why Luke had never noticed it before. He took it thoughtfully in his hand and let the strings sound. The instrument was completely out of tune, and Luke pulled a face. Without further thought, he tuned the strings.

Just as he was about to put the instrument back, his eyes fell on Reggie's song, which was still on the couch next to Luke's journal. With the ukulele still in his hand, he sat down and read the lyrics. Reggie hadn't added any chords, but the melody found its way into Luke's head by itself. Before he knew what he was doing, his fingers grabbed the strings, and he started singing. After the first verse he stopped.

Reggie kept bugging him with his country songs. Luke knew that his friend always liked the music and that he wrote his own songs. However, Luke had never taken the time to really deal with it and listen to Reggie. He was always busy with his own songs. All of a sudden, Luke felt like a really bad friend. He should have tried harder. Reggie shouldn't feel as if his music wasn't important or as if Luke was judging his passion for country music. In fact, Luke thought it was quite cute. Okay, everything about Reggie was cute. Luke daydreamed and smiled as he thought about Reggie.

Reggie how he performed full of power, energy and passion and played bass like a god.

Reggie as he sought the closeness of the others after each performance and recovered from the adrenaline rush together with them.

Reggie playing thoughtlessly with the sleeves of his flannel while reading a book that Julie had lent him.

Reggie how he sat next to Jules and explained formulas to her.

Reggie how he gave Julie a high five when she understood something or Luke when he played a particularly good riff.

Reggie how he kept spending time with Ray, even though he couldn't see him.

Reggie how he could always make everyone laugh.

Reggie's laugh.

Reggie.

Luke imagined his buddy's face when he learned that Luke had played his song. He saw it in front of him and knew that nothing could stop him from doing so.

Again, he took Reggie's song and read the lyrics before he picked up the ukulele again and started singing.

_Home, what is it really?_

_Sometimes it's a someone and not a place,_

_It's that feeling of being safe,_

_It's about who you're with at the end of the day... (and for me)_

_Home is where my horse is!_

_Riding through trees by the river_

_Feel the summer breeze smile gettin' bigger_

_Home is where my horse is_

_Don't need a house or a roof_

_I just put on the saddle, lace up my boots_

_Cuz home is where my horse is_

_I don't need the streets_

_Don't need the city lights_

_I don't need a fancy car_

_I just hop on my horse and ride_

_Home is where my horse is!_

_Riding through trees by the river_

_Feel the summer breeze smile gettin' bigger_

_Home is where my horse is_

_I see the beautiful beast running up to me_

_And I know_

_I'm home_

"You sing my song?"

Startled, Luke turned around and saw Reggie standing in the door of the garage. As usual, he was wearing his black torn jeans, his flannel tied around his hips, a white shirt and his leather jacket. His face looked incredulous.

"Yeah, uhm... Yeah, you know, I, uh, I thought I could do that for you. It's not much, but we can work on it if you want. You didn't write chords, so I made some up myself. I'm sorry if you had a different tune in mind. I didn't want to overstep. I'm sorry. I don't know if it can be a Julie and the Phantoms song, but it could be an ours song. Just Reggie and Luke, you know? Sorry, I'll just stop talking."

Stumbling, Luke got up, put the ukulele on the table in front of the couch and headed for the exit of the garage. He pressed his song into Reggie's hand, muttered another "Sorry" and walked past him.

"Hey Luke," Reggie called, as Luke was about to leave.

He was about to be everywhere but here. But at the sound of Reggie's voice, he turned around once more.

"Means a lot to me that you sang it."

Reggie smiled and Luke's knees went weak. Their eyes met and all of a sudden, all those feelings were back that Luke tried so hard to ignore. Reggie slowly walked towards him.

"Would you like to work with me on the song? Just Reggie and Luke?"

"Yeah! Yeah, I mean, sure. Totally. I mean, I'd love to," Luke stuttered and slammed his forehead internally.

How could he ever get close to Reggie if he behaved like a complete idiot? But instead of looking at him confused, Reggie just gave him a wider smile.

"Cool. Thanks, man."

"Are you free right now? We can start right away."

"I would love to do that, but I promised Julie that I would study with her. She has to read a book for English class that she doesn't understand. I only came because I left it here yesterday."

Luke couldn’t hide his disappointment.

"Oh, yes. Sure. I found it earlier. I put it on your amp."

"Thanks, man. I think Ray said the Molinas are visiting friends tomorrow, and Alex is on the road with Willie for sure. Let's work on the song tomorrow, okay?"

Reggie grinned at him encouragingly, and Luke nodded enthusiastically. He could hardly contain his anticipation.

On Saturday, the Molina house was quiet as usual. Everyone enjoyed sleeping in and starting the day without stress. This was enjoyed by both the living and the spirits. Although the boys theoretically didn’t have to sleep, they had made themselves comfortable in the loft. Once all the instruments were downstairs, there was plenty of space, which Julie had equipped for them with pillows, blankets and fairy lights, so that they could really feel comfortable there. When Luke woke up, he had no idea what time it was. There was still no sound coming from the house, and after looking to the left he realized that Reggie and Alex were still sleeping. Alex was lying on the far left and with his back to Luke, so he couldn't see anything except for his hair sticking out. Reggie, however, had turned to Luke and wrapped his arms around one of the pillows. He had buried his face in his flannel. It was the cutest thing Luke had ever seen. Carefully, he reached out a hand to brush a strand of hair from Reggie's face.

When he stopped himself from staring at Reggie's sleeping figure, his gaze landed directly on Alex', who had woken up in the meantime. His still outstretched hand fell to the floor in front of Reggie's face.

"Would you just kiss him already? Nobody can bear your lovesick staring," the drummer grumbled with barely any noise.

Luke looked at him in surprise and was speechless. Was he that obvious?

"Whatever. I'm at Willie's."

With a whoosh he had disappeared, and sounds could be heard from the house, but Luke had absolutely no intention of getting up. Especially, not after Reggie moved and suddenly took Luke's hand. Hesitantly and carefully, Luke slid closer to Reggie until their faces were only inches apart. Satisfied, he closed his eyes again, enjoying the peace and quiet and closeness to Reggie.

When Reggie moved again and seemed to wake up, Luke opened his eyes again. As the bassist slowly returned to reality, he came closer and closer to Luke until their bodies touched each other over their entire length. Blinking, Reggie opened his eyes and stared at Luke in confusion for a moment before a small smile spread across his lips.

"Hi," he whispered.

"Hi," Luke replied just as quietly. "That okay with you?"

Reggie just nodded while his smile deepened. Luke gathered all his courage and overcame the last centimeters between them. His lips met Reggie’s only so gently.

"Still okay?" Luke murmured.

"Yeah."

"Cool."

Luke pressed a real kiss on Reggie's lips before they broke apart.

"You wanna work on your song now?"

"Let's lie down for a little while longer," the bassist replied and snuggled up to Luke.

Satisfied, Luke wrapped his arms around Reggie and pulled him even closer.

Luke's fight with Alex had been a week ago, and nothing had been the same ever since. Reggie wasn't angry with Luke, but the guitarist couldn't forget the hurt and scared look on Reggie's face. It was his fault that Reggie had a breakdown. The first since they had come back as ghosts. He couldn't forgive himself for that. Reggie had already been through more than enough arguments in his life and deserved nothing but love. Still, Luke hadn’t been able to control himself and his frustration.

However, this fight was now finally done. Even for Luke. Reggie looked happier than the guitarist had never seen him before, and that was because of him. With a satisfied smile Luke breathed a kiss on Reggie's head before they made themselves a little more comfortable. Luke lay on his back. Reggie smiled at him before he pressed a tender kiss on Luke's lips and then laid his head on Luke's chest while he wrapped an arm around his upper body. Luke also pulled Reggie closer to him by wrapping both arms around the bass player.

"That’s nice," Reggie whispered.

Luke mumbled in agreement, kissing Reggie’s head again.

"I wanted this for so long," Reggie admitted.

Surprised, Luke looked at him.

"Really? Since when?" he asked.

"Uhm since the 90s. I don’t know the exact date anymore."

"Me, too," Luke confessed.

Reggie lifted his head in confusion.

"But you had Alex. You were together back then."

"Yeah, but we broke up, and one of the reasons were you. Alex and I realized that we’re better as friends at the same time I understood my feelings for you."

"And why wouldn’t you just talk with me about it?", Reggie teased smiling.

"Because I was dumb and scared. I’ll give you that."

They both laughed.

"You know … Last week, the fight. When you asked for my permission to hug me. I wanted it so badly, but I was scared to reveal my feelings for you. I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable or cause trouble within the band."

Eyes closed, Luke took a deep breath at that. Even before he understood his feelings for Reggie, Luke always wanted to protect him, so he never has to be scared again.

Earnest, Luke cupped Reggie’s face and looked him straight in the eyes.

"You could never make me uncomfortable, and you never have to worry about me rejecting you. I can’t live without you, Reg. I need you near me. It was always like that, and it will be always like that. You hear me? You can talk with me about anything."

The wide smile on Reggie’s face was blinding, and Luke’s heart ached from pure love and happiness. And with that Reggie kissed Luke tenderly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the last chapter of this fic, but I'm already planning the next one. It's all about pride featuring some awesome music. I'll write five chapters, one for each of my five main characters. Stay tuned. There will be a Spotify playlist  
> I already wrote a fic about Reggie discovering that he's bisexual. If that's something you enjoy, check it out.
> 
> You can follow me on Instagram @amebot2038 if you want to see more cosplay. I have a lot more over there :)
> 
> Thanks for reading!


End file.
